My wife and I have only been married 6 months, and she already wants a divorce. She is unwilling to do anything to try to fix our marriage as well. She says she doesn't feel loved by me and that she's never going to even try to love me until she feels I'm crazy about her.
I try to do as much as I can for her, but it's never enough. I wait on her (like a servant) every day without complaining or asking to be appreciated. I take care of her because I want to. She tells me that husbands are supposed to take care of their wives so me pampering her all the time does not express love; it's my job. She is Ukranian and speaks fluently in both English and Russian. I have enrolled in Russian classes after work once a week and also purchased Rosetta Stone to try to learn Russian. Over these six months learning Russian, I can only see that it's made her more mad and hateful. She gets mad because I still don't speak it fluently. She expects me to be completely fluent already.
One of her main issues with me comes from my inability to be the Godly spiritual leader of our family. I want to be the spiritual leader, but she is just so much smarter than me when it comes to knowing and understanding the Bible. She comes from a very religious family. At the beginning of our marriage, we would pray together at night. After a few weeks, she became angry with me because of how I pray.
One time, it was because of the order of how I said things in my prayer. Another time was because I was wearing my boxers when I prayed and that was disrespectful. I would try to correct everything she told me about, but there was always something else. After being beaten down so much, I started asking her what she prays for (she prays in Russian). She refused to tell me. The more she criticized me, the more self conscious and scared I felt to even pray out loud. Eventually, we started praying silently on our own before bed. I'll admit, it may not have been the right solution, but I liked that solution.
I felt that as long as we still talked to God, we'd be doing good and she would stop yelling and getting upset with me. Since then, I've asked her several times to pray together again, but she refuses to. I want to make her happy and feel loved. I want to do anything I can to save our marriage. When I ask her what I don't do, she tells me "everything". She'll tell me there's so much more I could be doing but won't tell me what it is. I'll be honest; I don't have the love for her that I once did, but I do still love her. I tell her I love her 100 times a day, but she says she wants wants to feel it. It's so hard because in my heart, I don't feel like she's giving me anything to love.
It's hard to be crazy about someone who treats you horribly. I know the woman I fell in love with is in there, but the more she doesn't show me that woman, the harder it is for me to come up with things I can do to show her I love her. I've begged her to go to counseling, but she refuses. She will openly admit that she knows the counselor will tell her that she has to do something for the marriage, and she is not going to do anything. Please help! I will do anything to save our marriage!
I try to do as much as I can for her, but it's never enough. I wait on her (like a servant) every day without complaining or asking to be appreciated. I take care of her because I want to. She tells me that husbands are supposed to take care of their wives so me pampering her all the time does not express love; it's my job. She is Ukranian and speaks fluently in both English and Russian. I have enrolled in Russian classes after work once a week and also purchased Rosetta Stone to try to learn Russian. Over these six months learning Russian, I can only see that it's made her more mad and hateful. She gets mad because I still don't speak it fluently. She expects me to be completely fluent already.
One of her main issues with me comes from my inability to be the Godly spiritual leader of our family. I want to be the spiritual leader, but she is just so much smarter than me when it comes to knowing and understanding the Bible. She comes from a very religious family. At the beginning of our marriage, we would pray together at night. After a few weeks, she became angry with me because of how I pray.
One time, it was because of the order of how I said things in my prayer. Another time was because I was wearing my boxers when I prayed and that was disrespectful. I would try to correct everything she told me about, but there was always something else. After being beaten down so much, I started asking her what she prays for (she prays in Russian). She refused to tell me. The more she criticized me, the more self conscious and scared I felt to even pray out loud. Eventually, we started praying silently on our own before bed. I'll admit, it may not have been the right solution, but I liked that solution.
I felt that as long as we still talked to God, we'd be doing good and she would stop yelling and getting upset with me. Since then, I've asked her several times to pray together again, but she refuses to. I want to make her happy and feel loved. I want to do anything I can to save our marriage. When I ask her what I don't do, she tells me "everything". She'll tell me there's so much more I could be doing but won't tell me what it is. I'll be honest; I don't have the love for her that I once did, but I do still love her. I tell her I love her 100 times a day, but she says she wants wants to feel it. It's so hard because in my heart, I don't feel like she's giving me anything to love.
It's hard to be crazy about someone who treats you horribly. I know the woman I fell in love with is in there, but the more she doesn't show me that woman, the harder it is for me to come up with things I can do to show her I love her. I've begged her to go to counseling, but she refuses. She will openly admit that she knows the counselor will tell her that she has to do something for the marriage, and she is not going to do anything. Please help! I will do anything to save our marriage!