How do you set boundaries with family without causing constant tension or guilt?
I’m still struggling with this. Someone usually ends up hurt no matter how carefully I try to do it.
Setting boundaries definitely changed our family dynamic, and not everyone liked it…but long-term it made things healthier.
Hacking your spouse is not exactly fair nor is it legal.
The guilt thing is so real. I think we sometimes confuse “they’re upset” with “I did something wrong,” and they’re not always the same.
What’s slowly helping me is keeping it short. Less explaining, less justifying. Just naming what works and what doesn’t, kindly, and letting them sit with it. There’s almost always tension at first, but it usually eases once everyone gets used to the new normal.
Anyone else been figuring this out? Would love to hear what’s worked for you.