What do I do to be cherished again by my spouse?
The best thing you can do to be cherished by someone else is to cherish yourself. In other words, people treat you the same way you treat yourself. Another way to look at it is that by healing yourself inside, you become a more grounded and authentic person who naturally attracts affection and love. As you do your own personal work of healing and self-discovery, you’ll also gradually start connecting more fully with your own humanness and, therefore, that of everyone else.
As a result, you’ll naturally create a closer and deeper bond with your spouse. I’m not sure where you are in your life but a good book that summarises this process is Living an Examined Life by James Hollis.